Yesterday was just another day in the life of a child of the Kunar family. It was my Aunt Debbie’s 58^th birthday and in celebration we went to one of our family's favorite Japanese restaurants, Shiro. My father came home around 6:00 PM to make sure we were ready for our 7:00 PM reservation. Like always, my father was driving us to the restaurant and wanted to make sure that we arrived on time, so we left my house promptly at half past six. Once we turned left onto the main road to Shiro’s, the adventure began. Immediately after turning onto the road, a green Toyota Camry cut us off without signaling. Now before I continue, it’s important to know that my father is a victim of road rage and every mishap on the road turns into the end of the world. So after the Camry cut us off, my father cursed rather loudly and then hit the steering wheel two times. One mile down the road, the Camry cut us off without signaling again. This time my father didn’t react as calmly and started screaming at the windshield and honking his horn at the driver of the Camry. I instructed my father to try and remain calm and just go around the Camry in order to make sure the incident didn’t occur again. Thankfully, we managed to arrive at the restaurant without anymore road-raging events, aside from my father speeding the entire time.

At dinner, everything went according to plan and my family was able to enjoy a nice dinner together, until we ordered desert. Numerous members of my family wanted to have a cappuccino, but they were unable to make them since their cappuccino maker happened to be broken. Outraged, my father was up in arms complaining about how ridiculous it was that they were unable to receive the cappuccinos they wanted and told the waiter that he would be going to Starbucks to get the coffee cup he rightly deserved.

My father’s anger during the car ride and in the restaurant was unnecessary and could have been avoided by using the Jefferson Strategy. The Jefferson Strategy is a concept used to manage anger named after Thomas Jefferson, where individuals take 10 seconds to think before speaking or responding to someone that does or says something that makes them feel angry (McCornack, 2009). By taking these 10 seconds to breathe and think before responding to the stimuli individuals adrenaline, blood pressure and heart rate all get some time to slow, which lets them response to the stimuli in a calmer matter. This method is effective everyday not only in face-to-face interactions but also in online exchanges. Taking a few seconds lets the mind self reflect on the situation at hand (McCornack, 2009). I try to use the Jefferson Strategy in all of my encounters, as I feel it’s the most responsible way to go about interactions with others.

In fact, I used this strategy when talking to my mother earlier today. I was telling my mom that I had to write a blog post for my SCOM 320 class and she said “Well go do it now.” Being that I had just woke up about twenty minutes before this interaction I wanted to say “Shut up mom, I’m going to do it once I get a chance to wake up.” Instead, I took ten seconds to breathe. After doing so I realized she was probably right and instead of telling her to shut up, I went to my room to start writing this post.

The Jefferson Strategy is a great way to make sure your emotions overcome you. Do you use the Jefferson Strategy in times where others make you angry? If so, how has it helped you in a situation where your anger threatened to get the best of you?

McCornack, S. (2009). Reflect and relate: An introduction to interpersonal communication. Boston, MA: Bedford/St. Martin’s.