All
of our routines may have been different on graduation morning, but for each of
us, the end goal was the same. We wanted to walk across that stage (without
tripping), we wanted to be handed a diploma, and we wanted to throw those silly
caps into the air.
Graduation had
arrived sooner than I anticipated. I was part of my class board and was
partially responsible for making sure things ran smoothly. To make matters more
anxiety-ridden, I had been asked to give the farewell address at graduation
only two weeks prior. There was no time to be shell-shocked. I buckled down and
hammered out a speech. One of the class board supervisors was the only one to
read and edit my speech before thousands of people would hear it for the first
time on stage at the Patriot Center at George Mason University.
On the morning of
June 24th, 2009 I gave a speech in front of the biggest audience I
had ever had to address. The valedictorian’s speech before me was a disaster.
She attempted to use an alarm clock as a prop in her speech and it ended up
going off several times (which was completely unplanned) and it also vibrated
and fell right off the podium. I felt horrible for her, but thought at least if
I didn’t completely bomb my speech, mine would be considered a success.
With
knots in my stomach and a dry mouth, I approached the podium. I mentally
blocked everyone out and told myself that it was just me giving the speech in a
rehearsal run. I kept reminding myself to slow down and make sure I pronounced
each word clearly. I breezed through my four-minute speech with only one little
hiccup. As I climbed down the stairs to reach my seat, my heart started to
race. I wondered if I sounded okay, if my speech was appropriate, and if it was
effective.
According
to McCornack (2010), interpersonal communication competence means consistently
communicating when you meet the criteria of appropriateness, effectiveness and
ethics. Appropriateness is defined as your communication following the accepted
norms. It is the degree to which your communication matches situational,
relational, and cultural expectations regarding how people should communicate.
An easy way to remember this is what should or shouldn’t be said during a
communication act. For my farewell address I knew that talking about us as a
class growing older and being successful was something that should be talked
about. However, it would not be appropriate to talk about all of my personal
stories through high school, any rumors I had heard, or gossip.
Effectiveness
is defined as being able to achieve your goals through your communication.
There are three kinds of interpersonal goals; self-presentational goals,
instrumental goals, and relational goals. I placed greater emphasis on the
instrumental goal as I wanted the class of 2009 to walk away with a feeling of
accomplishment and optimism for the future. I achieved each of these goals in
my speech, which was confirmed by my classmates’ and their parents’
compliments.
Ethics
as part of interpersonal communication competence is defined by your ability to
treat people fairly in your communication. Ethics is set by a standard
regarding moral behavior. Ethics can be easily applied to communication, if you
remember what ethics means in life. Treating people with respect, worthiness,
honesty and kindness are ways in which to illustrate ethics. When I was writing
my commencement speech and in its delivery, I was able to incorporate and
represent standards of moral behavior that I felt represented the class of 2009
as a whole.
This speech may have been given to an audience that was a little larger than what most communication scholars would consider interpersonal communication but I feel as though the occasion and setting for the speech called for it to seem as though it was interpersonal communication. For that reason I kept in mind the 'guidelines' for competent interpersonal communication.
Do
you feel that you have interpersonal communication competence? When is a time
that you feel you did and did not?
References:
McCornack,
S. (2010). Reflect and relate: An introduction to interpersonal communication
(2nd ed.). Boston. New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s
