My friends and I decided to view an action packed movie called, “Watchmen” on a Saturday night. It was only five of us, three guys and two girls (who happened to be very attractive). Two of my guy friends left the room and got involved in some other activity. At this point, I found myself in a great position to spark some conversation with these lovely ladies. The movie came to an end and we decided to turn on the TV to keep us entertained. We were sitting right next to each other and they even showed signs of interest by giving me positive glares with direct body attention. However, there was something holding me back. It was as if my thoughts and communication skills were not working right.
The night went on and things began to get more awkward with the conversations that ensued. It also seemed as if time was operating in slow motion because of the silence in the room. As a result of the silence and tension in the room, I began to get frustrated with myself and question myself. Why can’t you spark a conversation? Why are you so frustrated with yourself right now? What is holding you back? There are two beautiful ladies in front of you why can’t you just open your mouth and say something? These questions would haunt me for the rest of the night as I continued to sit there quietly until everyone left. It was not a happy night for me and I ended up going to bed with my emotions all over the place.
My life experiences and overall maturing over the last several has made talking with others a lot less difficult. The skills I’ve acquired through my education have significantly improved my communication skills. Also, learning about interpersonal communication in particular has helped to reinforce the confidence I have about communicating interpersonally.
McCornack (2009) discusses three main components that are valuable when learning about interpersonal communication: Interpersonal Essentials, Interpersonal Skills, and Interpersonal Relationships. When you incorporate these components into your day-to-day interactions, you can create happy and healthier relationships with others.
Interpersonal Essentials is how much you know about yourself and also involves your self-esteem. It will help you in the long run with managing your emotions by not letting them get in the way of your everyday communication. Judging others and having your preconceived perceptions that delay your communication is also addressed and having the right interpersonal essentials will stop you from making errors.
Interpersonal Skills is all about how you put the information you have learned and skill to the real test of connecting with others. You will also make your interpersonal communication competence stronger by communicating with ethics, manners, and in an effective way. Communication skills are very necessary to have because they will help strengthen your interpersonal relationships. With strong interpersonal relationships you can make positive choices and forward progress with people.
Interpersonal Relationships in my opinion is the primary component that you want to give a lot of attention. It covers the emotional aspects and thought processes that are involved in your communication. The majority of people allow their emotions, especially anger, to get in the way of their connections with others. It helps your conversation skills with friends, parents, loved ones, and connecting with people you just met.
“Interpersonal Communication is our primary vehicle for exchanging meaning, connecting emotionally, and building relationships with others” (McCornack, 2009 p. 32). With strong Interpersonal skills you will also allow yourself to network with other professionals. Practicing healthy interpersonal communication can also lead you to your significant other. The next time you engage one of your friends in conversation, think about all the aspects that keep your relationship positive. Start practicing with the ones that are closest to you.
- What are other essential components that you would add to interpersonal communication?
- Do you think it’s important for everyone to have this background knowledge? Explain.
- Without interpersonal communication skills where would you see yourself in life?
References:
- McCornack, S. (2009). Reflect & relate: An introduction to interpersonal communication. Bedford/ St. Martin’s.
